Record a personal story to share with the group.
You should speak your story in person and it’s telling should last approx. 2 minutes (if you prefer to record and publish in advance, that’s fine, otherwise it’s delivered live in session and stays within the closed group).
You should especially consider your choice of story/subject, your audience and your verbal delivery – in terms of your script, language, pace and intonation. No accompanying soundscape.
No pictures. Just a story.
For this task, I thought that it would be difficult to write something down because I never really found it easy to put into words what I was really thinking inside my head. I had a few stories I could think of but one stuck out for me. One particular part of my life was and still is a big part of me and I feel that a lot of people don’t understand this or know this about me. I thought that it would be an interesting story to tell, because it would open up people’s eyes to what I truly felt like. The subject that I chose to look into was my self harming and depression. A lot of things are said about said topic, and a lot of people just shun it off because they don’t understand the subject or the effects that it has on you. The handful of people that understood where I was coming from were people going through similar experiences to my own or were living with someone who had depression. This piece was one of the hardest thing’s I’ve ever had to produce for the sake of my work, but I thought that it would be worth it just to reach out to people and to make them understand that we are not all we seem on the outside. Below is my written piece that I spoke to my class:
You find it easy to judge,
You think I’m just feeling sad.
You told me ‘just to move on’
But it’s not as easy as that.
This isn’t a tale about my struggle,
But a story about truth.
It’s okay if you hurt,
Because I’ve been hurting too.
I don’t want your sympathy;
I just want your to understanding.
I’ve felt complete loneliness,
I always thought no one cared.
But if you really think about it,
Someone is always there.
I don’t remember when it started,
But it became a regular occurrence.
I don’t know why,
I did this to myself.
But pain was better than nothing at all.
I became numb,
I became empty.
A lack of self-control,
It was controlling my mind and body.
Imagine you are in a black box,
There is no escape.
No light shining,
You cannot see.
You don’t think clearly,
Your mind is clouded.
I blamed myself for my pain,
So I made it go away.
I would slice at my skin,
Like it was nothing.
I could feel the blade dig deeper,
An instant reaction,
Yet I never stopped to think.
It would bleed,
And it didn’t bother me.
I look back now,
And I think how far I’ve come.
I’m stronger,
I’m wiser,
I’m healing.
My scars don’t define me,
But they certainly remind me,
Of the times I’ve survived.
For me, to speak this to the group was very hard. I stuttered and stumbled upon my words and got a little choked up when speaking but I carried on nonetheless. When I was writing my piece, I didn’t intend for it to be a poem, it just seemed to form nicely that way. And when read it comes across more powerful, that the shorter sentences punch more. During our sharing session, I heard quite a few stories but there was one in particular that caught my attention. This was because of the emotion behind the story and I could sympathise on a level that I have similarly felt that way but not in the exact same way. You could tell that the story was a difficult one to tell, but was important to express for the author.
Kerrie Caine 